Beauty is Pain

This would be one of my coworkers and a new national I've met.  We were hanging out at her house, and I decided to ask questions about beauty, especially related to what I've learned about in a book I recently read called The Beauty School of Kabul.  Although I am nowhere near Kabul, I learned a lot about women there, their beauty techniques based on what is available to them, but also their life stories. These people have a lot of life stories to tell, and sometimes they will really open up and educate us about themselves while they participate in beautification techniques.  My coworker and I learned that almost all of the beauty techniques practiced in Kabul are also regularly practiced here, especially when it comes to brides and grooms and their guests at wedding events.

I loved this national's local dress.  They call it a kras and I have recently had 2 kras made but I will hopefully pick them up from the seamstress in a couple of days.  I hope to post a picture of them in the near future.

Hair removal here is a big deal, especially for the face.  Many people here tend to be on the hairy side.  Many girls have some significant unibrowsn and some of the women's hairlines extend almost all the way down to their eyebrows.  They often get threading (called hefaf) done to remove the hair, although when it is being removed from large areas, they will use different types of wax to get it done.  My coworker, S, and I got demonstrations of both hefaf and waxing on our arms this particular day.  Kind of painful.

In a town two hours southeast of us, it is considered stylishly unacceptable if you do not wax your arms.  In our town it is common to have it done, but not 100% unacceptable, so I plan to avoid it if I can.  However, I could not avoid my new friend, Z, threading my face.  I told her "Okay, but I'm going to cry."  She said, "Okay, cry."  So now, after I did indeed shed tears, I have a "clean" face.  And then afterwards, we talked about her own pain, as she has premature arthritis and back problems, and I remembered her pain for her.  Would you also remember Z, that she would find healing?

Sheva Henna

I'm learning a good bit about new culture here and one of the things I am learning about is weddings.  I find that weddings are simply a big deal no matter where you go around the world.  I had been in K-land all of 3 days when I got to go to a Sheva Henna.  This is an event (like a rehearsal dinner) that occurs the night before a wedding.  The bride's family have a party at her parent's home and the groom's family have a party at his home.  The Sheva Henna I went to was at the groom's home.  The men and women congregate in different rooms for the beginning and major duration of the night, eating apart from one another and spending time in conversation apart from one another.  The groom's family and guests then go to the bride's house, bringing a large platter/bowl of henna that is festively decorated.  The groom's family (unless they are extremely conservative) dances around the bride, puts special jewelry on her, wraps money around her fingers, and takes tons of pictures.  She poses with everyone, although no one smiles.  Most especially, the bride will not smile, no matter if it is for a picture or not.  Whether she is happy or not about getting married, her job is to look sad that she is leaving her family.  The groom's family then goes back to his home and everyone dances in a big circle.  For those who want, they can dip their pinky finger in the henna to show that they have been to a Sheva Henna.

This is a view from above when the groom's family dances around the bride, waving colorful handkerchiefs and carrying the platter of henna. (The bride is seated in the yellow arm chair.)

  

 However, this was MY view of the bride:

These people get a little crazy when it comes to dancing, especially for wedding events.  I definitely had my toes stepped on.  But it was fun, although I had no idea what I was doing.

I wonder about these brides and their hopes and dreams.  Their destiny after their marriage is to be a slave to their mother-in-law.  One or two brides may find they have a new family that welcomes them and lovingly helps them adjust.  However, most find they are immediately the cook and housekeeper for well over 10 people, with little to no assistance from the other family members.  They must also have children as soon as possible, hopefully to ensure that their husband won't take a second wife.  Please remember this bride as I am likely to encounter her weekly as I visit others at her new home.

The Mound

So, my city is pretty large (at least half a million people), but there are no road names or anything like that.  When people here give driving directions, they are always confused because they have to give landmarks instead of street names and no one seems to know the same landmarks.  In order for people to better navigate the city, large neighborhoods have mounds to designate that area.  Each mound is the Neighborhood Mound so you can just direct your taxi driver to which side of the mound you'd like to go.  The picture below shows a mound a mound near us, although not the one designating my neighborhood.

This picture was taken from my colleague's rooftop.

This is what the city looks like in the opposite direction:

 My city is in a valley and we are surrounded by mountains on either side.  It is incredibly beautiful (except when there's dust, but more on that later).

Later, I got to go up on top of the mound:

 The top of the mound is nice and windy and a great place to fly a kite.

There are so many people here living in a world of uncertainty.  Many of these buildings didn't exist more than 20 years ago (whatever was here 20 years ago was probably bulldozed to the ground by a dictator bent on genocide) and such is life for this people group.  They have to live each day not knowing how long they'll be allowed to live in peace.  From what I can see, they choose to not think about the "what ifs" and "maybes."  They just take what each day brings them because they know they may lose everything next week or next year.  But each time they have to run and hide in the mountains, they come back and pick up where they left off.  They are so resilient, but I hope they can learn that there is One that they can always rely on, that will always be there for them when all their material needs are gone.

At the end of our afternoon on the mound, we took a picture.

 

 I hope you excuse the pose and the face I'm making.  It was my first time taking a picture like a K.  There is no smiling allowed (and you all know how much I like to show off my pearly whites!)  As far as the distance between me and everyone else, I have no excuse.  I'm just awkward, I guess.

Hello from K-land!

Hello from K-land, everyone!  I am officially connected, internet-wise, although don't expect me to be online all the time, and probably not even every day.  Internet service here is like a 3G network and, from what I hear, I pay by the hour.  I'm gathering that it isn't a lot per hour, but they can add up quickly depending on how slow the internet is at the time I try to get things done.  Thanks to all who have been remembering me during the last couple of weeks as I traveled and as I got set up here.  I will eventually post pictures and reports on numerous things that I have been doing in the last 2 weeks, but for today, how about some info on my initial 2 days of travel?

 This would be my very last meal in the US for probably the next 2 years.

At the Dulles Airport: Cinnabon and some very delicious Juice that has no clothes on.

After I got stuck in Frankfurt, Germany for 24 hours, I had nothing to do so I went on a walk.  My hotel that the airport assigned to me was surrounded by the German equivalent of Interstates, so there was only one place to walk to and that was a historical area with 2 old German planes used to airlift supplies across the Berlin wall before it fell in 1989.

Also, I had to send out some emails from the hotel in Frankfurt, and I had to use the hotel's computer.  I swear it took almost 30 minutes to type out a 10 sentence email and it was all because of this keyboard:

It doesn't look like much but the simple switch between the Y and the Z was annoying beyond belief (plus, jet lag was hitting and I was crashing).

More pictures will come in the near future (which, for the next couple of years, I hope near future to mean "within a week or so").  I hope everyone is doing well, and I hope to schedule some much needed skype sessions with family and friends soon.  I love you all!